|Hi! I'm sorry I let you wait for this part for such a long time. It's should have been longer, but that's all I can finish at the moment. I hope you enjoy it!|
Title: Lost (Chapter 14)
Pairings: Colin/Jared overall, Ewan/Jonathan
Cast: Jared Leto, Colin Farrell, Ewan McGregor, Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Eamon Farrell Jr.
Summary: Someone's drunk and someone's jealous.
Warnings: slash, drunken people, insult of Orlando Bloom
Beta: the adorable lady_erzulie
Feedback: Always makes me smile.
Disclaimer: Nothing but lies.
Note: The words in italics (the song Colin sings) are not mine as I've stolen them from the Simpsons. You can listen to it here.
Jared, Ewan and Jonathan were wandering through the dark and cold streets. None of them said a word as they all were quite busy with their own thoughts. While Jonathan made sure always to be on Ewan’s side, Jared let himself fall back slightly, which made him look more like Ewan and Jonathan’s distracted child than like their friend.
“Where d’ya like to go to, Jay?” Ewan asked making Jared look up startled. “D’ya have any idea?”
Jared was fumbling nervously with his fingernails and bit his bottom lip. He looked from Ewan to Jonathan as if he wasn’t sure whom to talk to.
“Shall I or Jonny choose somethin’?” Ewan asked patiently.
Jonathan, however, looked at the American with nothing but cold rage, although he feared that Jared might not get his disregard for him.
“Could we… um…” Jared began biting his thumbnail. It was startling how faint the singer’s voice was.
“Just fuckin’ spill it!” Jonathan urged him impatiently, which he got a smack for on the back of his head from Ewan.
“Shut the fuck up, will ya?!” Ewan hissed through gritted teeth, but he was still loud enough for Jared to hear him.
“I can’t stand it when he does this little puppy thing!” Jonathan said to Ewan, but watched Jared’s reaction from the corner of his eye. To his disappointment Jared didn’t react at all.
“He’s lost his brother, so could ya please be a bit more tentative?!”
Jonathan rolled his eyes, but stayed quiet.
“Jared?” Ewan asked with an encouraging smile, which made Jonathan sigh impatiently. “Where d’ya wanna go?”
Jared took Ewan’s hand and dragged him past the disco and more into the centre of the town. Jonathan quickly went up to Ewan’s other side and glanced at Jared and Ewan’s entwined hands.
They walked in silence until Jared stopped in front of a mouldy though cosy looking little bar/disco.
“Could we go in there?” Jared asked shyly.
“What the hell is this?” Jonathan asked moodily.
“Um… I’m not too sure either. I just spotted this on one of our first eves here and I found it quite… attracting. But we can go to somewhere else as well if you’d prefer to.”
“Yes, I would indeed prefer to-”
“For sure we can go in there, Jay,” Ewan said, silencing Jonathan by twitching him into his side. Then he placed an arm around Jared’s shoulder and led him into the bar, Jonathan following begrudgingly.
The moment they entered, Ewan realized that they were in a gay bar, as guys were sitting in pairs, exchanging sweet nothings, kisses and more and some were dancing very obscenely. When Ewan felt Jared’s insecure gaze, he gave him a smile and led him and Jonathan to an empty table– sitting down between the two of them to make sure nothing went on as Jonathan behaved extraordinarily odd.
“I’m so drunk, I can barely see but it helps me get through another day! My stomach is filled with haggis and ham, I’ve – Hey, Eamon, I’m sure Ewan sings this song all of the time” Colin giggled. “Ya know, cuz haggis and Scot. D’ya get it?”
“Why d’ya always have to get drunk when we’re out, hu?” Eamon asked grumpily, instead of answering while he carried his little brother home who answered him with a belch. “Hadn’t ya once stopped drinkin’?”
Colin giggled. “That was a long, long time ago, in happier days when everythin’ was fine and, ya know, little kids were playin’ on playgrounds and birds were singin’… such things. Ya know what I mean?” Colin slurred while he hung limply over his brother’s shoulder.
“Cols, I mean it, either ya stop drinkin’ or ya lose some weight. Ya’re way too fat to be carried home all the way.” Eamon complained ignoring Colin’s little philosophies.
“Jared’s lost a lot of weight” Colin answered.
“Here we go again” Eamon sighed for he had already been wondering how long Colin would make it without mentioning the American again.
“But he still looks beautiful. I’ve never seen such a beautiful guy before. I mean, he looks better than… than…”
“Orlando Bloom?” Eamon proposed, but Colin just said: “Pff… Orlando Bloom’s ugly.”
“Well, at least he’s not fat.” Eamon murmured.
“I’ve heard that!” Colin protested. “I ain’t fat, ya’re just weak!”
“Whatever.” Eamon mumbled.
“No, I’m sorry, Eamon. Ya ain’t weak.” Colin said, suddenly tearful. “Ya’re great. I love ya so much. I guess if ya were dead I’d be fucked, too. Literally” Colin giggled. “Did ya get that, bro? I mean in connection with Jay and me. Fucked and fucked?”
“Yeah, got it, Cols,” Eamon lied lethargically. “Hilarious. Gimme the key.” He added halting at the door to Colin’s little house.
Colin sighed. “I loved to fuck Jay.”
Eamon rolled his eyes and started rummaging inside Colin’s back pocket.
“I mean the way we did it the first time.” Colin went on babbling. “Ya know like gently and stuff. He looks so beautiful when he comes.”
“I’m sure he does.”
“But he doesn’t like to be called beautiful. Guess he doesn’t want people to reduce him to his looks.” Colin slurred wisely. “Are ya fondlin’ me?”
“I’m fuckin’ searchin’ for your motherfuckin’ keys.”
“Good. Cuz if ya were fondlin’ me that’d not be good. Cuz honestly, Eamon, ya’re not my type.
“How sad.” Eamon commented whilst he finally pulled out the key and opened the door.
“Yeah, I know.” Colin said when Eamon carried him into his house, into his bedroom. “But besides that, I’m in love with Jared.”
“No kiddin’?” Eamon teased his little brother whilst he laid him down on the bed.
“No, actually, I love him more than my own family. More than Cathy and more than Conny and more than mum and more than dad and more than you. All together. Love him more than everybody else except for Jimmy, cuz, ya know, ya always gotta love your kids more than anythin’ in the world, even if they’re brats. But Jimmy ain’t no brat, he’s dazzlin’, ya know. Love him. Just hope he doesn’t turn out like me.”
“What’re ya talkin’ bout?” Eamon asked while he took off Colin’s shoes.
“Well, that he rapes the man he loves just like me for example. Or the woman. Don’t expect him to become gay, I mean, he likes cars and so.”
Eamon’s gaze darkened with sorrow when he looked down at his burdened baby brother. He sat down on the bed and tugged Colin lovingly into the cloth. “Colin, why don’t ya talk to Jared? Tell him that ya’re sorry and that ya love him. Maybe he forgives ya.”
To his surprise Colin started to cry in a way that only kids, pregnant women and drunkards can cry. It wasn’t easy to understand Colin’s bubbling and he surely wouldn’t, hadn’t he known and understood this man since he was born. “Sure he’d ‘gimme” Colin cried out. “He ‘ready di’. Dunno, in ‘is fuck’ up mi’, guess, thinks ‘t wa his faul’ or some shi.1” Colin wiped away the hot tears that were floating heavily out of his eyes only to let them be replaced by new ones.
Eamon lay down beside his trembling brother. He hadn’t seen him like this since he was three and some dumb kid had destroyed his sand castle. But back then it was enough to help him build up a new one, whereas now Eamon didn’t know how to help his little brother.
“I wan’ ‘im back, Eamon!2” Colin cried out, his voice shaky with sobs.
“So why don’t ya go back to him?” Eamon dared asking.
“Cuz I ‘ate meself when I’m with ‘im!3” Colin cried and all of a sudden hid his face in his brother’s shoulder. So Eamon wrapped his arms around him and rocked his little brother to sleep.
1 For sure, he would forgive me. He already did. I don’t know, in his fucked up mind, I guess, he thinks it was his fault or some shit.
2 I want him back, Eamon!
3 Because I hate myself when I’m with him.
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